This morning my family assembled to lay my grandfather to his final rest, first having a small service to share memories of the too-short time we spent with him. I chose to share a few words, and I have chosen to post them here to memorialize a great man, my father’s father.

I’m told that first meeting my grandfather when I was a baby, he held me for almost an hour, whispering advice. Of course, I don’t remember what he said, but since then I’ve had twenty years to learn from him.

These are Things I Learned From My Grandfather.

You have to break a few eggs to make an omelette.

I very faintly remember spying a gift for my little sister before it was time for her to receive it. Grandpa scolded me quite strongly, insisting that I had not in fact seen the gift, almost convincing me that I had seen nothing. Now that I’m older, I understand why he did so: he wanted surprise to be perfect for my sister,he wanted to ensure that the moment was pure.

Show your elders the respect they are entitled to.

I remember when I first learned my grandfather’s first name. On a visit, there were envelopes left unopened on the kitchen table, junk mail left to be sorted. Printed on the envelopes was the name “Thomas E. O’Brien.” Knowing that only two people lived in the house and that “Thomas” was a boy’s name, I deduced that this mysterious “Thomas” must be my grandfather. When he came downstairs, I let out a “Morning, Thomas!” This took him aback and left him out of sorts. Thus was I treated to a lesson on when (and more importantly, with whom) it is appropriate to use a first name.

It’s a great thing to be able to whistle.

I tried in many different ways to emulate my grandfather, going so far as to eat a banana every day with breakfast whenever I’d visit. Since I’m really, really not fond of bananas, this didn’t last very long. What has lasted is the fondness for whistling that grew out of my parroting what I heard from him. And parroting is the most appropriate word, because even now my squeaky tunes don’t compare to his songbird-like abilities.

Walking does a person good.

This was just as much a constant as the whistling. Grandpa takes walks. And whenever he took his walk, he would come back relaxed, satisfied and invigorated. He had formed a habit out of something positive, something I really should work on myself.

Out of anything with value, love holds the most.

There is no doubt in my mind that Grandpa would do anything for his wife. Coming from someone who heard many of his stories, his favorite one to tell (and my favorite to hear) was how he met Grandma. The only adjective that accurately sums it up was adorable. His obvious love for Grandma, coupled with the smile he always had on his face while his family visited, showed the world that his loved ones ere the dearest things to him, that they fully held his heart.

I wish I had more time to learn from you, Grandpa, but I’m grateful for what I had. Rest well, Grandpa. I love you.